Welcome to the soul of natural hair. The positive expression of black aesthetics by Lady Kinnks. Visitors may surf our site and blog to celebrate natural hair.
Get Your Exclusive Kinnks Tee...
Next entry: Hairitage Cruise 2010
Previous entry: Becoming a Product Junkie
I guess my natural hair “journey” started long before I decided to go natural. Before I went natural, I never recall seeing a lot of women with natural hair besides those with locs. So I associated “natural hair” with locs, and locs just wasn’t something I was interested in for myself. Growing up I always wanted long hair, and I had finally gotten long hair, but it was still very boring. I hated going to salons because I hated sitting under a dryer for hours, and just sitting in a salon for hours made me crazy. I would style and relax my own hair at home, and only went to the salon every 3-6 months to get my ends trimmed. I had the same clique experience most of us had growing up, being told that kinky, thick, “nappy” hair was “bad” and wavy or straight hair was “good”. Not only was my hair “nappy”, but my hair is very, very thick. I would get my hair pressed until I was old enough to get a “kiddy perm” – either way my scalp was getting burned. I started developing seborrheic eczema on my scalp as a pre-teen, and began getting my hair pressed at the recommendation of my dermatologist, along with using cortisone ointments almost daily. One pool party sent me back home begging my mom to let me get a relaxer again. Since my eczema was under control, she said okay and I went back to relaxing my hair and applying the cortisone ointment from that point on. I tried the Toni Braxton cut in my junior year of high school (1995), and hated it, so it was my mission to just grow my hair as long as I could. Fast forward to adulthood….
In June 2008, my husband and I became regulars at local outdoor concert series that features Old School R&B, NeoSoul, Hip-Hop and Jazz artists, and drew a mostly Black audience. As I would sit in my lawn chair, just people-watching, I would notice women with natural hair in a variety of lengths, colors and styles. And I was in awe – just loving the fact that there were so many possibilities with natural hair. But me, I was stuck with my relaxed hair that quite honestly I had gotten bored with. So that sparked my interest and curiosity. I would spend the entire time pointing out hairstyles to my husband – “Do you like that? What about her hair? Do you think that would look cute on me?” He told me that he liked the natural styles, but that what men really find attractive about a woman is her confidence. As a man, he could care less what hairstyle I had, as long as it was neat, clean, and I felt good about it. That was just what I needed to really start looking into it.
I started tuning in to the Michael Baisden show on a local radio station, and he would have “Your Body is Your Temple” day on Thursdays. The show would featured experts on health topics, and I caught one discussion about chemicals found in beauty products and how women could be killing themselves slowly in the name of beauty because of the chemicals found in many products. I heard different experiences from women who talked about the damaging effects relaxers had on their scalp and hair. I know there is some controversy over whether certain chemicals are truly harmful or cancer-causing, but I was beginning to think “when in doubt, leave it out.” I started off with just using coconut oil instead of store-bought lotions. I checked out lots of natural hair websites and blogs, and decided I was going to go for it. I was getting ready to turn 30, and I thought, at my age, why do I even care what people think or say? I’m getting too old to not at least try it, and if I don’t like it, I’ll just relax again. Its just hair.
I got my last relaxer July 4 weekend2008 , and started “transitioning”, and it was TERRIBLE! Because my natural hair is so thick, and the relaxed hair was a lot thinner and weak, the point of demarcation was just a tangled mess, and I experience a lot of breakage. I didn’t want to damage my natural hair with heat, so I did not get my hair straightened during my transition. The more my hair grew, the more frustrated I became and the more borderline negative comments started pouring in. Mostly, I got – “Soooo, what’s going on with your hair?” The more I explained, the more confident I became in my “why” for going thru the process of going natural in the first place. At the same time, because of the stark contrast of textures from my natural to my relaxed hair, it simply just started to look unkemp – which is definitely not my style. I never step out without my hair “laid” so I’m sure folks were sincerely worried about my mental health. But I was still hesitant about cutting my relaxed hair off because I don’t like short hair on myself. I was still doing research, and I kept reading that I couldn’t see what the “true texture” of my natural hair was until I did the Big Chop and cut all the relaxed hair off. I tossed the idea around for weeks, and then one day, December 18, 2008 to be exact, I just said “I’m done”. So I decided I would just do the Big Chop and get Kinky Twists put in. I came home from work, grabbed the first pair of scissors I found, not even meant for cutting hair, and just started cutting. I actually could feel the weight of the relaxed hair coming off, and it felt great!
Then I looked in the mirror, and I hated it! It was just too short for me, so I immediately drove to a salon that allowed walk-ins, and got Kinky Twists put in. I moved so quickly, that I never got to take pictures of my Big Chop. But I was just happy to have hair long enough to put in a ponytail until I figured out just exactly I was going to do with my natural hair. I was so afraid of what it would look like once I took the Kinky Twists out, so I left them in until my husband and I were on our anniversary vacation the last week of March 2009. I felt that would give me a week away from everyone to take them out and try to figure out what I was going to do before going back into the “real world” around people I knew. Unfortunately, I had left the extensions in so long, that my hair had started to lock, so I ended up having to cut my hair again. But I was starting to get used to this little afro I had. I took a picture of my hair on my cell phone and sent it to my mom and my girlfriends. Within the hour, I was getting phone calls and text messages from people saying how cute my “little head” was. My dad told me that my mom was so proud of me and thought it was so cute that she had to send it to everyone and was showing everyone she came across. That made me feel great, especially since she initially was one asking “what are you doing with your hair?”
When I came back to work, I got nothing but rave reviews from most of my co-workers. Still some said “I can’t believe you cut off all that beautiful hair” and I would reply “I’m just growing some even more beautiful hair.” Then my kinky, coiled afro became a conversation piece, and drew other naturals to me almost immediately – all willing to offer advice and suggestions. The best suggestion I got was to watch YouTube videos. This avenue gives you the ability to not just read about natural hair care or look at pictures, but to see live people taking you, going thru the motions and showing you the way. I also had a natural friend who made some of her own hair care products at home. She gave me some ideas and recipes to try, and I really enjoyed researching different natural ingredients. I made it my goal to use products that were 100% natural or very close to it, and I even started making my own concoctions. My true hair texture started coming thru, and I learned how to take care of it and style it. And now I’m able to go without that cortisone ointment for my seborrheic eczema now because I can cleanse my scalp more with my natural hair without worrying too much about messing up my hair style. I’ve found all natural alternatives, and am able to keep it in control – without pharmaceutical medications.
I was so excited when the summer of 2009 rolled around and it was time for the concert series to start up again. I was excited that now I was going to be rocking my own natural hair. Of course, I was still pointing out all the cute hair styles I saw, but now I was having other naturals actually saying to me “I like your hair” and that meant the world to me.
I’m constantly reading and watching videos, trying to get as much information as I can. And I’m finding that now I’m inspiring others that I know to go natural as well. I even created an email community of my friends that either are already natural, are transitioning, or are just interested in possibly going natural. It seems like every time I turn around, another friend is contacting me to say they are thinking about going natural now – or having a “natural hair emergency” of some sort. So I decided to just collect everyone’s email addresses, and as I come across articles, blogs, or videos – I send them out to the group via email. But what made me most proud, is when my mom did her Big Chop in January 2010! She is really enjoying her natural hair.
About three months ago, I started making YouTube videos myself and it is so much fun. I decided to go with a nickname I was given as a teenager, Monchhichi, because I felt like I really looked like one of the cartoon characters now with my natural hair. I named my channel “ItsMeMonchhichi”, and the rest in history in the making.
~Monchhichi
Link to my YouTube Channel
